


Look in the Mirror

by VampireNaomi



Category: Lupin III
Genre: Infidelity, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-01
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-30 14:14:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18316901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VampireNaomi/pseuds/VampireNaomi
Summary: Albert burns his fingers. What-if based on episode 10 of Part 5.





	Look in the Mirror

**Author's Note:**

> Includes background Albert/Tickey, but I didn't tag it.

Lupin didn’t take him to Pont Neuf like he’d asked. When Albert noticed, he didn’t say anything. The bridge was where this night would come to an end, and there was something about that thought that made him regretful.

Sunlight was still barely a tinge in the sky when Lupin stopped the car in front of a motel by one of the roads leading to Paris. A row of trucks stood in the parking lot, not a single person in sight. Lupin pocketed the car keys and stepped out. Albert did the same a second later. He didn’t ask what they were there for. 

Following Lupin inside was as familiar as putting on his old coat for the first time in years. He didn’t have to think about it, as if it was only yesterday since he’d last done it. As long as nobody put it into words, this could go on a little longer like it was normal.

Lupin had a key card. He’d already rented the room before they’d run into each other at Guillaume’s. It brought back some of the adrenaline rush from that night and made Albert’s heart beat faster. This wasn’t impulse. He’d planned to take him here. Lupin had wanted this from the start. The realization was better than any wine Albert had ever tasted.

The night had made his blood rush in a way he hadn’t felt in years. The thrill of bullets whizzing past, the sound of bodies hitting the ground, risking everything in pursuit of treasure. Working near seamlessly with Lupin, the only sign of the years apart the harsher edge to their words. It was close to frightening how easily everything had clicked back into place.

And exhilarating. They had come out on top against a stronger enemy, like so many times before. They were invincible together. Albert didn’t regret the decision to move from visible crime to operating from behind the scenes, but there were times when he was shackled by his new life. A thief was free to go wherever he wanted and do anything he could imagine, but his hands were tied by bureaucracy and keeping up appearances. He had to keep careful track of countless people in the government, the army, and the law enforcement and try to guess their moves and shifting allegiances in advance and make the best of them. It had its appeal, but tonight Albert had held a smoking Luger in his hand and felt young.

That buzz in his head didn’t start clearing until much later when sunlight was already peeking through the shutters on the window. There had been tentative kisses that had quickly turned heated and warm hands on his skin. He didn’t remember who’d taken off whose clothes, or if they’d said anything in-between the kisses and haste to touch and feel, but the memory of sinking onto the bed and pulling Lupin on top of him was a lingering bliss.

He must have dozed off afterwards. His body ached all over, whether from the bruises and bumps of their adventure, or the sex, he didn’t know. It was tempting to remain there and not move for the whole day.

The room smelled of cigarette smoke, a brand that sometimes made him turn his head in the street when he passed someone smoking it. Albert pushed his face into the pillow, fighting against the clarity that was starting to take over.

The first precise thought in his head was that neither he nor Tickey smoked those cigarettes. He bolted up and nearly fell off the edge of the bed.

“Well, good morning! Had a nice nap? You really are out of practice if one night of running around and a good fuck make you go out like a light. Want a smoke?”

Lupin was sitting in bed, leaning back on a pillow with one arm tucked behind his head. A cigarette was dangling from his mouth, almost as gnarled as the smirk on his face. That was not the smile he’d given him earlier.

Earlier, when they’d -

“W-what did we do?” Albert asked even as the haze cleared and he began to remember every bite, every thrust of hips, every moan, and how right they’d been. It was a long time since he’d last felt that good, but now he feared he might choke on his own breath.

Lupin took the cigarette from his mouth and reached to tap some ash onto the bedside table.

“You can’t remember? You didn’t even have anything to drink! Should we do it again as a reminder? First thing in the morning, what a great way to start the day! Then again, it was the crack of dawn, so I guess we already did!”

“I have a boyfriend!”

Lupin looked at him like he was the stupidest man in the world. 

“So? Didn’t stop you the first time around.”

And perhaps he was. The past few days, he’d been obsessing over the black notebook and the damage Calvess was doing to all his plans. The moment he’d made up his mind to take matters into his own hands and threaten Guillaume into talking, he’d forgotten about everything else. He hadn’t spared a thought to Tickey all night. 

“But you… you _knew_ about him! Why did you bring me here?”

Lupin rolled his eyes. “What, am I your nanny or something? It’s your job to remember you have a boyfriend and act accordingly. I figured you just didn’t care.”

“Asshole! It’s your fault! There’s no way you didn’t notice I wasn’t myself last night! I got caught in the moment, and you took advantage of that!”

“I didn’t force you into anything. You were begging me for it.”

“But I -”

No matter how he tried to twist the facts, the truth remained unchanged. He’d willingly followed an old flame into a cheap motel, knowing all too well what would happen, because he’d wanted to keep feeling like he was special and on top of the world. He’d not thought about his boyfriend, the black notebook, or his goals.

“You did this on purpose, you bastard!” he spat at Lupin.

“Did what?”

Albert’s only response was an angry growl. He grabbed a pillow and tossed it at Lupin’s face, which made him burn himself with his cigarette and yelp in pain.

“Hey,” Lupin said, wiping his lips with the back of his hand, “if you want to be mad at someone, make it yourself. You messed up. I just gave you the opportunity. Honestly, I didn’t think you’d take it. The Albert I knew years ago would have never cheated on his boyfriend. Then again, that Albert is gone and left behind only his sense of panache and flair for being furtive, isn’t that right?”

It was right then that Albert realized Lupin had indeed planned this whole thing, but not the way he’d thought. It wasn’t that he’d been feeling nostalgic and wanted him even after all these years. All Lupin wanted was to get back at him for using him to steal the notebook, for shooting him, perhaps even for walking out on him and giving him an easy victory all those years ago. And the way he’d done it was so masterful that he would have laughed and congratulated him if he hadn’t been worried it might turn into tears.

“Is that how much you hate me? You should have just tried to kill me with another car bomb!”

Lupin stretched his long limbs lazily. “That was just to make sure that if you took me out on the bridge, you wouldn’t live long to enjoy it. This is something else. It’s just like you said when you shot me. It’s more fun to keep the victim alive and let him witness your complete victory. You orchestrated everything so carefully, and yet you walk away with less than you had in the start. I take it all.”

Albert only meant to cuss him out, but all that left his throat was a snarl, and suddenly he was pinning Lupin down on the bed, hands on his throat. Lupin stiffened, and that infuriating smirk was finally gone when Albert pressed his knee against his gunshot wound.

And yet, Lupin wouldn’t shut up. 

“Acting so high and mighty. Tricking me to do your dirty work for you. Stealing France? Ha! What’s that supposed to mean? It wasn’t enough for you to become Lupin III so you want to be the next Napoleon or what? You have delusions of grandeur and all I did was take you down a notch.”

“Be quiet! I don’t want to hear another word!” 

Albert knew he’d never be able to kill Lupin like this. He had to have a gadget or two hidden in the pillow or in his tooth or something, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t his life he was after. Hurting him was enough. The bastard, it was all his fault. Without him -

“No need to get so worked up,” Lupin added, voice strained but with an insultingly gentle edge to it, even as he struggled to breathe. “Your relationship is built on lies anyway. What’s one more? Just go home and don’t say anything. You were never going to tell him what you were really doing tonight in the first place.”

Slowly, Albert let go of Lupin’s throat and stared down at him. He was right. He didn’t have to tell Tickey anything. It was so obvious, and yet he had trouble getting a hold of the idea.

“And have you blackmail me? Don’t make me laugh,” he said.

Lupin rubbed his throat and coughed. Albert took some delight in the realization that he’d have bruises later. 

“I’m happy just knowing I was able to lure you into showing your ugly, two-faced heart to me and seeing that look in your eyes. I don’t care what happens to your relationship - or you - once we part ways here. You should be glad it was me. With anyone else, you’d have to worry they’d go and tell your boyfriend,” Lupin said.

“There wouldn’t have been anyone else! I only did it because it was you! Nobody else would have known what buttons to push to make me -”

“Oh, come on. You’d have gone with anyone last night. You barely noticed it was me. It was all about your ego and getting to ride the high a little longer. Maybe you miss your old life, or maybe you’re having a midlife crisis. Either way, you were pawing at me before I’d even closed the door. I went along with you, not the other way around. Your cute boyfriend cooks for you, but I guess he’s not much in bed since you were that desperate.”

“Go to hell!” His fist slammed against the bed frame where Lupin’s head had just been. The bastard slipped away from under him like it took no effort to dodge his punch. Albert looked at the nightstand where he’d left his gun, but reason cut through the red fog in his head. Getting caught after murdering a man he’d slept with in a cheap motel was not how he wanted his career to end.

“I’ll get you for this,” he said, but the words sounded empty even to him. He could try to have Lupin arrested or killed or plot something to humiliate him as a thief, but it wouldn’t change what had already happened. He’d lost, and there’d be no rematch.

His anger fading, it hit him how exhausted he was. He wanted to go home, and yet it was what frightened him the most.

He began to collect his clothes and slunk out with them, slamming the door shut and ignoring Lupin’s cheery farewell. He got dressed outside in the parking lot and didn’t care who might see him. The sunlight made his eyes burn and he had to squeeze them shut for a moment to gather his thoughts.

A look at some signs outside the motel told him it’d take him at least two hours to walk home. He had enough money on him to call a taxi, but he decided he needed time to clear his mind and figure out what he was going to do next.

He imagined what it’d be like to go home and tell Tickey he’d spent the night at the office. He’d be annoyed he hadn’t said anything in advance, but he wouldn’t question it. They both had hectic jobs with schedules that could change at a moment’s notice. With the recent terrorist attacks spreading fear throughout France, Tickey would understand why a police director was busy.

It’d be so easy, and it made him so sick. He’d lied to Tickey about so much, but those had been necessary lies. He _had_ to keep him in the dark about his real goals, the methods he used, and his past. There was no other way. He was right to do so.

Albert felt like he needed to throw up but that even sticking fingers into his throat wouldn’t make anything come out. He was certain he’d never feel normal again.

Lupin was right. It was a relationship built on very little but lies. He’d talked big about leaving his life as a thief behind, but one thing hadn’t changed. He still lied to his boyfriends about what he really did when he went to work. He’d long since stopped feeling guilty about that. As long as he could get away with it, why not?

However, this was different. This hadn’t been necessary. Sleeping with Lupin hadn’t brought him closer to his goals, hadn’t been something he had to do. It hadn’t been part of the plan. He’d just… Albert thought about Lupin, recalled the night, and marvelled at how much he could loathe a man who’d been the only one on his mind mere hours ago.

He’d never loved Lupin, not the way he loved the men he dated. There had been a time when Lupin had felt right, but he’d known it was fleeting and the things they wanted too different. But just like back then, Lupin was still the only man he could be honest with. It was liberating to be with someone without having to put up an act. Lupin already knew the worst he could be.

Apparently better than he did.

He was a complete fool. He’d let himself be lured into thinking the adventure last night had been something special. That _he_ was special, that he and Lupin had something nobody else did. Laughable. What was it that they’d said when Lupin’s friends had shown up?

_“Your thief buddies like sticking their nose into your business.”_

_“Yeah. Funny how you don’t have any.”_

Lupin had other people who’d taken the spot he’d given up. He didn’t need him for a night’s adrenaline rush. The only one who’d been desperate for anything was Albert. And all that after he’d told Lupin he had no panache left. It was pathetic.

He’d acted so confident about leaving his past behind, but he’d clung to it the whole time. Why else would he have kept so many mementos? Why else would it have been so easy to slip back into old habits and have the time of his life? Of all the memories that could have haunted him in his sleep, it was Lupin telling him he wasn’t cut out to be a thief.

His mouth was dry, and he was sure he could still taste Lupin on his tongue. How could he kiss Tickey ever again? He was the sweetest man he’d ever known. It’d break his heart to learn about this. He’d think he wasn’t enough. Even if he forgave him and said he understood why he’d be drawn to an old flame, Albert didn’t think he’d ever smile at him the same way again. Why hadn’t he thought about that until now?

He should keep quiet. It was the only sensible option. And yet, he already knew he couldn’t. It wouldn’t be just another lie. It was simple to justify all the other things he didn’t tell him about because they were connected to work. But this mistake was private and cut so deep that he was sure their relationship would change even if he said nothing. It was sickening to know that he was weak enough to betray the man who was supposed to be the most important person in his life. Tickey deserved better than a boyfriend who chased memories in the night to heal the fractures in his ego.

It had been a mistake to get Lupin involved in this. He should have found another way to get the notebook. He should have listened to that voice inside him that had kept nagging at him that one of the reasons he’d walked away from the competition between them was the certainty that Lupin would win. But he’d felt so sure of himself and had decided to gamble, for old times’ sake, to show Lupin that he’d made the right choice and was standing above him. 

And then he’d lost something he hadn’t even realized was on the table. It was a side of Lupin he wasn’t familiar with. He’d grown into his title when Albert hadn’t been looking.

Albert stopped when he arrived at Pont de Champrosay and leaned his hands on the railing, glaring down at the Seine below him. A burst of anger rose within him, but this time it was directed at himself. He tore off his coat and tossed it and his Luger into the river with a resentful cry, wishing he had done so ages ago.


End file.
